10 Tricks to Talking to Tech (Support), Part 2
5. It’s Not That You Didn’t Get an Answer, It’s That You Didn’t Like the One You Got
Don’t ask the question again, in a different way. Don’t say they’re wrong. You can try to understand, say you don’t understand, even mention that you’re having trouble because you understood something else. Let them explain.
But asking the question repeatedly, in different ways, again and again. Well, most of these guys are graded on phone time. They won’t want to answer your next question. Then you’re lacking info. And now you’re screwed.
4. Finish Your Statements
Normally the reason techs don’t understand is because you don’t finish your sentences. For example, think about this.
“Well, when I open Word a box comes up that says. . .see I was working on this project and then I forgot to save. . .wait, that’s not the beginning of the story. What’s going on is I installed Word and it went fine. Now I’m trying to open a file my sister sent me. When I do, oh, right, she sent it through e-mail. If that matters. But see when I open it, this box comes up that says. . .”
It’ll go on like that. Explanation after explanation without ever giving the problem. Then you’ll get mad at them because they’re obviously not listening. Now you’re frustrated, they’re exasperated and suddenly you’re cutting each other off. Put it differently, try using a friggen noun.
You have to finish your sentences for them to help you.
3. Let Them Finish Theirs
No kidding. They’re probably answering their question in a way that teaches you something. The moment you interrupt them and say “That’s not what I’m doing” they decide you’re an arrogant shit and just try to get rid of you.
Think about it. Your question was “Can I use my cell phone as an alarm to wake me up?”. They need to tell you that you can but if you have your phone on silent, it’ll vibrate rather than screech.
But the moment they say “You will need to have your volume turned up”, you say “I’m not asking about the volume!”.
Well, fine then. Jerk. “Yes, you can use it as an alarm. Turn it on here.”
They’re fine with you waking up an hour or two late because you can’t hear carpet vibrate. Or having your computer freeze due to overheating. Or your business fail because you’re rude to them. See, remember,
2. Techs Don’t Care About You
They care about the problem. They’re freaks who live in their mother’s basement (or the equivelant) and spend all their time fixing, well, something. Anything from problems with their MMO character to a global virus outbreak to a Ford Pinto.
Let me say this again: They don’t care about you.
1. They Care About the Problem
You should be happy about this. Most techs will get intrigued by weird and new, well, technical failures. This is the reason we made it to the moon, got cell phones and can drive to work faster than 30 MPH.
It’s not that weird. Hit them with the issue and once they understand you could literally watch their eyes light up. If you weren’t on the phone. Yeah, they’ll get frustrated and growl, maybe some good cursing. But they won’t stop. They almost can’t stop.
Even so, it gets fixed. If you’re nice, patient and they’re capable.
One other thing that would be added is DO NO USE FULL CAPS! I am a tech and a good one I know that because I still have a job. Most people who suck wont get hired after a few places. There are a few things that Will almost kill any desire to help and one of them is CAPS. I am sorry but it is not a cruse control for Awesome.
Are you a Chat tech then? I mean, otherwise that would be an interesting phone call. . .
Well I am but there is also Email support. For someone who does not know, CAPS is the same as Screaming or Yelling. Example:
I just want my issue resolved now.
I JUST WANT MY ISSUE RESOLVED NOW.
Caps are, first, hard to read and just plain rude.
Seth Godin wrote something about complaints a few days ago http://sethgodin.typepad.com/seths_blog/2010/01/amplifying-complaints.html